Sometimes

Because the process itself is about learning, not about prepackaged perfection.

Last night, I listened to a man expound on the fact that each of us exists in the world in a thousand, thousand different forms, as characters in the living narratives being written by other people.

In someone’s story, you’re the hero. In another’s, you serve as the villain.

Some people remember you fondly as a forever seven year-old, or as their first love; others only know you as your current age.

You’re the goofball in somebody’s funny tale, and a tragic figure in someone else’s story. You’re the sinner from one perspective, and the saint from a different angle.

Indeed, as many traces of you as you’ve already left behind, you can never truly know how you’re being seen, remembered, described, or interpreted.

You will never hear yourself speak from outside of yourself; you will never get to watch yourself enter a room, or to notice how the energy shifts when you leave. All these understandings of you that others are cataloguing? You will never have access to that full catalog.

So then…who IS this “you” that you so carefully strive to curate for other people? Where is it? When is it? What is it—and why does it even exist?

None of those questions make much sense in the context of this shared and interdependent reality.

What remains, when I release my attachment to answering those questions?

HOW do I wish to interface energetically with all that I am interdependent with, as well as within?

My current perspective on that:

I prefer to move in this world gracefully, with a baseline attitude of reverent wonder.

I prefer to radiate a baseline energetic frequency that signals the presence of compassion and kindness.

I prefer to interpret and send directed, or focused, communication signals both wisely and patiently.

And I prefer to engage with all current expressions of interdependent sentience from an inner default state of peaceful intentionally.

As I practice, I sometimes fail. As I fail, I sometimes learn. As I learn, I sometimes evolve. As I evolve, I sometimes transform. As I transform, reality sometimes transforms so it can meet me how I now am.

So I do that.

Sometimes. ❤️